Haven't had a dream in a long time...

Life is hard.  This is not a revelation.  But sometimes when you stop for a moment you realise the impact of the hardship.  The stress of the last 12 months has made life small.  I just focussed on getting through the week to the weekend, or reaching the next pay day.   The weekends were for recovery and not a lot of money to go and do anything more than a coffee out.  In the midst of all this came two things - my tax return and the announcement that Morrissey was touring.

It lit a spark in both Peter and I.  And in the last 10 days life got big again.  Morrissey played Melbourne first - our home town. We queued up outside the venue at about 5pm, meeting up with other Morrissey fans we have come to know via Instagram.  Hugs exchanged and nervous and excited chatter began.  We also met other people while we tried to stay warm in the gusty, rainy afternoon., including the lovely Taylor (a young teenager who had flown down from QLD as this was the only show that didn't clash with his High School exams).  The doors opened and we headed for the front. We all scored front or second row. You could have fuelled a small village with our enthusiastic energy.  Then Moz and band appeared.  5000 people sang Suedehead and Everyday is like Sunday en masse.  It was a blast.

Waiting in the cold in Melbourne

Melbourne - 22nd October 2016

Melbourne - 22nd October 2016

A few days later we flew to Adelaide.  We were sharing accommodation with two of the Moz Army - Rae and Penny.  Beers, cider and drunken pool games celebrated our arrival in town. Penny handed me something - a beautiful hand made makeup bag with Morrissey emblazoned on the front.  Another of the Moz crew, Loreolei ordered some from the U.S.  We had planned to exchange them in Melbourne but I couldn't find her in the crowd.  Penny did, and it seems that Loreolei gifted them to us.  It is so lovely of her.  We headed out to see Morrissey in Adelaide.  Drinks were arranged at a pub near the venue.  Peter and I arrived a little later and started talking to someone at the bar. We invited him to come and sit with us.  It turns out Michael was following Morrissey around on this tour. Morrissey does invoke a certain level of super fan, and some people are lucky enough to travel country to country, gig to gig.  He had seen Morrissey over 100 times. The super fans are wrist banded and directed to the barrier.  We had heard that only the first 5 rows were going to be allowed to run to the front barrier.  The rest of us were restricted.  After only knowing us for about half an hour Michael offered to sneak his ticket to us after he'd been wrist banded so one of us could get closer.  Somehow we managed to pull this feat off.  I was amazed at the kindness and generosity shown by someone we had only just met.  It's lovely that the karmic good will shown to Michael somehow flowed to us.  We didn't quite get the opportunity to thank him properly.  With Peter down towards the front, I danced like a crazy person getting as close as security would allow.  This is the joy of being in a town where none knows you - dancing like an idiot will not haunt you.

Thank you Loreolei 

Adelaide - 26th October 2016

The following day we made the trek to Canberra (via Melbourne!).  We bid farewell to Penny who was regretfully heading home.  With delayed flights it took us all day. While collecting our luggage we saw in the distance Morrissey's band at a different luggage claim.  We smiled and gave the thumbs up to Boz one of his guitarists.  We found our airbnb apartment.  Rae arrived and we went for a drink.  It had been a long day.  The next day Simon arrived and we also bumped into Kelly, Susan and Casey.  As all these people live interstate it was lovely to chat over drinks.  Arriving at the show Peter and I finally got front row barrier.  I chatted to the girl next to me.  We joked while overhearing a really loud conversation between two people behind us. She apologised saying she was a magnet for annoying people.  I smiled.  Peter had someone trying to push through to the barrier.  But he and the girl next to him stood firm.  In these situations I often think of Daria Morgendorffer (my spirit animal) and her quote of 'Hell is other people'.  The curtain dropped and the show began.  It was amazing and I sang my heart out.

Canberra - 28th October 2016 

Canberra - 28th October 2016 

Canberra - 28th October 2016 

The others were off to a Smiths / Morrissey club, but Peter had caught a cold and just lasted through the show.  We headed back for a quiet drink and to trawl through our photos of the evening.  He told me he wanted to yell out at the gig 'Morrissey, come and touch my wife's hand'. I loved him a little bit more right at that moment.  The following morning the others took off for the next show but this is where our Morrissey Odyssey ended.  Three gigs in three states in seven days. Crazy.  We watched via social media as the others continued to the last two shows.  Simon posted saying that his psych had told him to do something 100% for himself.  It reminded me of the advice Peter got in 2012 about his depression and anxiety - 'go and do something fun' was part of the prescription.  Each October since we have celebrated Fun-fest.  A week (or two) of just doing crazy, fun things.  Usually it's Melbourne Festival time...it's also the month of our wedding anniversary.  We never seem to have trouble finding some way of injecting something out of the ordinary into our lives. I'm so pleased that this year it got to be Morrissey.

As difficult as it can be with a combination of shyness and social anxiety between the two of us, Peter and I were lucky to share fun times with amazing people.  We were enveloped by people's generosity and kindness.  As hard as it is to come back to reality I am grateful for our adventure.  I hope we can have drinks with the Moz Army next time any of them are in Melbourne (we do better in small groups).

It has also made me realise that I need to start a 'fun fund'.  Even if it's only a few spare dollars each pay we should be planning more crazy adventures, more fun times... and remembering to dream.

Some of the merch I bought


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